Friday, February 25, 2005
Thinking about life
Trying to think positive about life. I have been so negative about EVERYTHING for so long. I need to be positive it will help with the depression, with my family generally with my life's situation.
today's words I have been reading "enjoy what you have." Live the life you have with the income you have. Money does not make you happy. (this I knew already from the money I use to make it did not make me happy just wanted more. I missed so much time with my boys but now I am not missing a thing. I am here with them for many reason and it is a good thing. I felt it was late at first but I now know it is never to late to be home for you kids.)
I have decided that I do not like my blog design but my computer will be leaving soon so I'm not sure I will have time to redesign it before it leaves for repairs. I am sad already. I should of just send it the other day but I could not let it go.
I did tell Jesse yesterday how much I appreciate him. I told my boys I love them and I gave them each a hug. I told Karley I loved her and hugged her but we always hug. I also told her I am proud that she is sticking up for herself with her mom. It is a great big improvement that she is able to tell that women she is lying. She is doing it in a subtle way but she is still getting her point across. I am proud of her. My boys stayed home tonight and played Magic they are actually getting along no fighting. Of course Zack is sleeping now but still it was a nice night.
Jesse poor guy is not feeling well so I sent him to bed at 7:30 he needs to rest so he is better so he can work next week. Guess I wore him out. :)
It all will work how things are finally coming together. I must have faith that God's plan is a good one for me this time. To often in my life I have been burdened with unbelievable experiences. It's time for a change.
today's words I have been reading "enjoy what you have." Live the life you have with the income you have. Money does not make you happy. (this I knew already from the money I use to make it did not make me happy just wanted more. I missed so much time with my boys but now I am not missing a thing. I am here with them for many reason and it is a good thing. I felt it was late at first but I now know it is never to late to be home for you kids.)
I have decided that I do not like my blog design but my computer will be leaving soon so I'm not sure I will have time to redesign it before it leaves for repairs. I am sad already. I should of just send it the other day but I could not let it go.
I did tell Jesse yesterday how much I appreciate him. I told my boys I love them and I gave them each a hug. I told Karley I loved her and hugged her but we always hug. I also told her I am proud that she is sticking up for herself with her mom. It is a great big improvement that she is able to tell that women she is lying. She is doing it in a subtle way but she is still getting her point across. I am proud of her. My boys stayed home tonight and played Magic they are actually getting along no fighting. Of course Zack is sleeping now but still it was a nice night.
Jesse poor guy is not feeling well so I sent him to bed at 7:30 he needs to rest so he is better so he can work next week. Guess I wore him out. :)
It all will work how things are finally coming together. I must have faith that God's plan is a good one for me this time. To often in my life I have been burdened with unbelievable experiences. It's time for a change.
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Gratitude
What a day!
What take that back what a week. Saw the Dr and told her that I can't be on several new meds at one time. It is making me off center to be on so many at one time. Yikes! I still guilty for asking this from her. Though, this is my body and no one know my body like me.
Many feelings of emotion today but lets hope that I get it all together.
I feel pretty up right now. wow!
Well off to watch today GH!
What take that back what a week. Saw the Dr and told her that I can't be on several new meds at one time. It is making me off center to be on so many at one time. Yikes! I still guilty for asking this from her. Though, this is my body and no one know my body like me.
Many feelings of emotion today but lets hope that I get it all together.
I feel pretty up right now. wow!
Well off to watch today GH!
Monday, February 21, 2005
Greetings
The days have been really busy here at the old home.
I went to a Hockey funeral only to find out that Hockey just might not be dead. But I took pictures, signed the book, cried......laughed, though I did not make it to the wake I would not of been awake for the wake. lol.
Stil struggling with Jesse but it is a battle that will last for the rest of our lives, I guess. When you went something so bad.... and it always makes you cry..... how do you make it.... Yes I know that part of it is all my fault. I have not been on any depression meds for a month, my mom's birthday is coming and that is making me real sad, my boys are growing up and not needing me and it makes me even sadder. The Masto is kicking me in the ass.
Alex went to a club the other night I never expected him to like the idea. HE did!
Zack had friends over that had a blast 5 teenage boys in my house I was not ready for it. Thanks God Karley was not here.
ok more later.
I went to a Hockey funeral only to find out that Hockey just might not be dead. But I took pictures, signed the book, cried......laughed, though I did not make it to the wake I would not of been awake for the wake. lol.
Stil struggling with Jesse but it is a battle that will last for the rest of our lives, I guess. When you went something so bad.... and it always makes you cry..... how do you make it.... Yes I know that part of it is all my fault. I have not been on any depression meds for a month, my mom's birthday is coming and that is making me real sad, my boys are growing up and not needing me and it makes me even sadder. The Masto is kicking me in the ass.
Alex went to a club the other night I never expected him to like the idea. HE did!
Zack had friends over that had a blast 5 teenage boys in my house I was not ready for it. Thanks God Karley was not here.
ok more later.
